Singleness: Strengthening the spiritual family

I must admit when I saw this week’s session on Singleness my first thought was “Isn’t this a marriage study?” How grateful I am to have heard this message. As a married man, I don’t tend to think of what it’s like to be single. I never seem to question what the single person experiences. And then I’m reminded that in my sinful nature, I see first through my eyes and my experience.

Our culture, secular or Christian, puts great emphasis on the importance of marriage. It’s just what you’re expected to do. You graduate college, get married, and have kids. Society thinks that something must be wrong with you if you’re not married. That could not be further from the truth. I mean, we all have something wrong with us, but it has nothing to do with being married or single.

While I’ve enjoyed diving deep into the meaning of marriage, it’s equally important to talk about singleness. Specifically, how God uses the single people of the world for His mission.  A biblical discussion of marriage would not be complete without it. After all, Jesus was THE perfect human being, and He was single.

“It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do.”  (1 Corinthian 7:8)

There is beauty in marriage partly because of the opportunity to mirror the gospel within the confines of the marriage. But there’s no denying that as a married couple, it is difficult to serve the way a single person can. In a marriage, you take on the responsibility to your spouse. You are connected to another broken individual in a special way that takes a lot of time and energy to nurture. I have often thought about wanting to “do more” for the Kingdom of God. Then I must weigh the cost of time taken away from my wife and kids. As a married person, my number one priority in serving God is to serve my family. The single person has more opportunity to love and serve the spiritual family as a whole.

“For your Maker is your husband-the Lord Almighty is His name” (Isaiah 54:5)

The institution of marriage is of this world. God can use it for His glory and our benefit. But let’s not forget that we are the bride, and Jesus is the groom. From a Christian perspective, we know that we are married to another broken person. We will never find complete fulfillment in another person. Marriage allows us to mirror the gospel and grow in Christlikeness. Singleness equally provides that opportunity. But neither marriage nor singleness is the ultimate. Both are of this world, both are fleeting. Regardless of our relational status, all roads lead to Christ. He is the only spouse that can fulfill all our needs.

“Your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.” Mathew 6:8

God knows what you need and when you need it. If you are single, it is because He has made it so. If you are married it is because He has made it so. Regardless of your marital status, know that you are in God’s care. The beauty of it is that God is inviting you into His Kingdom right where you are. In your job, in your marriage, in your friendships, God has given you what you need. He has assembled a variety of followers to do His good work.

The path to holiness is not characterized by your relationship status. God wants to use you for His Kingdom right where you are.  One is not better than the other. Both provide great opportunity to love God and to love others. It’s worth stating that as Christ followers we must be set apart in our thinking patterns. To not see things from a worldly view but from a heavenly one. To see the value that our single brothers and sisters bring to our spiritual family. And that something as trivial as our marital status could compare to the identity we have in Jesus Christ.